Regular Day Schedule - 2 Toddlers

There are few things I like reading more than schedules of moms in a similar state of life, even though most of them are pretty much the same. So here is mine. For semi-anonymity I am referring to my children by their ages, since they didn't ask to be on the internet 😉. I currently have a 1 year old (14 months ish) and 2 year old (34 months ish). 

Day in the Life

5 AM - This is when I aim to wake up each day. My husband also wakes up at the same time to workout. Depending on how many times the 1YO got up throughout the night sometimes this gets pushed, but the day goes significantly better when I do get up at this time.

I am currently doing the Meg Hunter Kilmer A Year in the Word Bible journal except I do not currently write in the journal (saving it for a future year). I like it a lot more than Bible in a Year because I can read everything and go back and re-read because I'm tired etc. Then I usually do some intercessory prayer and a morning offering. Then I do some online "work" / maybe read until someone wakes up. * 

*As with basically everything, this can get shortened if the 1YO wakes up, but he usually sleeps until 6:30 ish

6:30 AM - I wake up the 2YO, this involves waking up the 1YO too because he is in our bed so for safety reasons my husband or I need to be right near him so he doesn't fall off the bed. Ideally, just the 2YO would be woken at this time to get some 1:1 time with him and because he needs more awake time before his nap than the 1YO does. I wake him up by turning the light on in the hallway and then he says that he is awake if he is up. If he doesn't say this then I usually just open his door so we know right when he wakes up. He sleeps on a floor bed and we don't have stairs to worry about. We all hang out in his room for a bit until it is time to make breakfast

This was previously 7AM before DST. 

7AM - I start making breakfast. 90% of my time inside the 1YO follows me around wanting to be picked up, if he is like that when I need to make breakfast I put him in the high chair and he is usually happy with that. I normally make some variations of eggs, toast, sausage, and fruit (right now grapes). 

I clean up breakfast, the 2YO plays, I might be also holding the 1YO. 

We do morning prayer. This consists of going to our altar table in the family room, me lighting a candle if the 1YO is in his high chair still, if he isn't I've been using a fake one. We have been saying the opening prayer from this book, then I do a free-form morning offering, and intentions

8AM ish - Get everyone dressed for the day, brush teeth

If we go out of the house (spots we frequent are the library, grocery store, MOMs group, playground, daily Mass, Adoration, farm) then we aim to do that in the first "chunk" of the day. The 1YO takes two naps but the first nap is usually pretty "rough" so it is easier if he just takes a quick nap in the car or in the stroller or carrier when out and about. If we aren't going anywhere then he nurses to sleep then I put him down in his room. 

I pack a snack or everyone eats one before we leave depending on where we are going

11:30am - We eat lunch around this time every day. Popular lunch items are leftovers, cheese & crackers, sandwiches, mac & cheese, and always fruit iykyk. I occasionally make my husband's lunch for the next day at this time

12:30pm - I put the 2YO down for his nap. He gets tucked in then I pray, play the "I'm thinking about game", then lay with him for a bit while the 1YO crawls around. 

The 1YO is usually up for 3-4 hours ish at a time, depending on how short his 1st nap was he is usually ready to nurse to sleep shortly after the 2YO goes to bed. I do try and arrange the 1YO's nap so he is asleep at the same time as the 2YO. 

2:30pm /2:45pm ish- I usually wake up the 2YO around now so he can go to bed for the night at a reasonable time. This time was later before DST. He eats a snack after he wakes up and we play something together, usually I-Spy, cars, kinetic sand, or magnatiles

3:30pm - I make sure the 1YO is up around this time (he is normally already awake). We all play something together or sometimes take a walk 

I start making dinner when my husband gets home and we usually eat by 5:15 ish. 

I do laundry every day or every other day during the week and have an ongoing pile usually of clothes that need to be put away. I don't fold the kid's clothes to save time. That and dishes are the only chore-type things that regularly get done during the day due to 1YO mostly always wanting to be held.

Thoughts on Breastfeeding

In honor of National Breastfeeding week, JK I just wanted to capture my thoughts on breastfeeding since it takes up a significant amount of my life and because I have time to type this (I quit my job).

I love nursing. It seems kind of odd that I can love something as utilitarian as feeding a child, I do not have the same feelings about baby led weaning or feeding toddlers solid food (this is one of my lesser favorite tasks actually). Before actually having kids I naively thought I would nurse but then have Brendan give the baby 1 bottle at night. I do not think I understood that that would mean I would need to pump while the baby had the bottle. Having a little break sounded nice at first but in reality this meant needing to wash bottles and pump parts and pump which in my mind is a million times more of a hassle than nursing! I realize this is not the case for everyone!

I have been nursing for the last 801 days. It seems like not that big of a deal and it isn't but it does impact a lot like:

What you are able to wear. I wear anything that can be pulled up, pulled down, or with buttons. The actual "nursing" tops are not cute at all but they are super practical and are actually my favorite because of the ease

What you can eat. Idk if I'll go more into this but I didn't have dairy for a few months with my 2nd child which was a BIG deal because 90% of my diet was cheese. Otherwise I am not too restrictive but it is still something I keep in mind, especially when having alcohol or caffeine or broccoli. Also I have never experienced hunger like breastfeeding hunger, especially toddler nursing hunger like I would literally feel dizzy and famished

When you can leave the house. Basically if I want/need to leave the house without a baby I need to leave right after I feed them to have a window where I am comfortable enough leaving them and won't worry about them being hungry. I have been without this 2nd baby for sure less than 10 times. I'm not saying this to complain, if I really wanted to make it happen I could but the advance planning/ pumping is not worth it to me. 

Symbiotic relationship. Idk what else to call this point but before actually living it I don't think I realized that nursing very much so takes the mother and her needs into account not just the baby's. If I go longer without feeding a baby my body is also impacted. I have yet to get mastitis or a clogged duct but especially at the beginning it is also going through my mind, like I don't mind a baby clusterfeeding as much because it is also helping me out 

With the first child, I fed on a schedule and on demand. I did the wake up to feed thing at night and during the day until the Dr. gave the okay to stop. So basically, I didn't let the baby go longer than 3 hours without a nursing session but during the day especially this usually was around 2 hours. After I got the ok to not wake to feed, I didn't wake the baby at night anymore but during the day I'm pretty sure I capped all naps at 2 hours and would feed on average every 2 hours. I think I read this in Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding or something from the La Leche League but it is impossible to overfeed a breastfed baby so basically whenever the baby cried I nursed and that was my go to. I had a planned trip when baby was about a month old or else I probably wouldn't have ever used a pump. I got a Lansinoh one that the insurance covered and I don't have anything to compare it to but it was, fine. I remember being super intimidated by the thing and think I tasked Brendan with figuring out how to set it up. I reached out to the La Leche League for help getting the baby to take a bottle and watched some videos on "paced bottle feeding". I honestly don't know how to give a baby a bottle, Brendan was the only one who did this idk how it went. When my first child was around 10 months he stopped taking a bottle but before that there were no issues. This probably happened because there was a big stretch of time between the first time he had a bottle and the next (like months).

With my first kid I was always worried about my milk supply tanking if I went too long in between feedings. 

Nursing During Pregnancy

My milk supply dropped drastically when I was pregnant with my 2nd child (totally normal) and I continued nursing my first child the whole time. I read Adventures in Tandem Nursing which I recommend. I didn't experience any nursing aversions but if I did it would be helpful to know that that I wasn't going insane. 

Things That Are Different With My 2nd 

I don't remember my milk coming in being as much of a "thing" with my 2nd because I was still nursing another kid while I gave birth (not literally but ya know). I think it is also common for milk to come in faster in general with children after the first. I also didn't experience any pain during nursing (at least none that I recall), I did have some for the first few weeks the first time around. Actually, this is worth mentioning now that I think about it, with my first child, when latching on one side (slacker side) it reallllly hurt like say a bad word hurt for the first week or so. I didn't see a lactation consultant but I always tried to get a good latch. With my 2nd kid, I didn't worry about examining the latch or making sure it was "good" after the first week probably. I also didn't worry as much about my milk supply. In one of my 2nd kids follow up appointments, like the ones that happen the day or so after you are discharged, jaundice was mentioned and after that I realllllllly kicked it into high gear and made a big effort to make sure I nursed all the time, which is really hard with a super sleepy baby who has his days and nights mixed up. I nursed at least every 2 hours (maybe 3 at night) and made sure to do all the massage stuff etc. to keep him awake for a "full feeding". I would nurse for 20 min max each side with my first child, but with the 2nd after he made up his birth weight I would only do 1 side at a time if he felt content unless it was the last feed before bed. Oh in case you are wondering the turn out with the jaundice, at the follow up appointment in 2 days or whenever it was, baby got the all clear and made up his birth weight + some and I texted Bren that I kicked jaundice's a**. Not sure if that is what actually happened but it does feel like SO much pressure for the mom because I really felt like I needed to make it my sole mission those few days to feed the baby as much as possible. I also never bothered introducing a bottle and am more chill on the waking during naps because of frequent night wakings (the former could be the cause for the latter who knows)

The Good

After you make it out of the stressful newborn days when you can be super worried if your baby is getting enough to eat (I empathize so much with this struggle as it really feels like it is all on you) nursing is really quite lovely! I like the ease of not having to worry about amounts, as the baby can just stop when they are content and it is impossible to overfeed according to la leche league or something. You don't have to worry about cleaning, sanitizing, proper temperatures, that stuff realllllly stressed me out. It is nice having a basically guarantee way to calm a baby and knowing that you will never run out of food

cute (imo) baby pic to balance out all the text. also disclaimer, this is obvi not a recommendation or medical advice. this is just my experience!

Bruno’s Birth Story

I’m planning on also writing a 3rd trimester recap and my thoughts on Bruno’s first month of life so I won’t include info on that here. If I had to give my birth experience a reddit title it would be “Positive Induction Experience at 40+5, FTM”. 

Birth is one of those unique experiences that everyone who is present and part of the “labor group” that is in the room with you is kinda bonded forever over the shared unique experience. The only thing that it kinda reminds me of is running a  marathon. Similar aspects:

• You can die in both events
• A sip of water or snack can give you a much needed boost 
• You can do a lot to train or you can do nothing
• A lot of it is mental
• People who’ve done it love to talk about it
• People cheering really helps give you a boost

I was scheduled for an induction for May 28th on May 6th if I didn’t go into labor naturally beforehand which spoiler alert I didn’t. I felt pretty neutral about my Dr. recommending I be induced, it was kind of nice to know an “end date” and I trusted her rec even though there wasn’t a specific medical concern. There was some date that the Dr. office I went to basically requires you to be induced so having a planned date a little before that and after my due date didn’t seem like a big deal to me. I want to mention here that I get the need for “due dates” but wish it was more like a due date range that you would get, I did not anticipate the weird mental stuff that would come with going past my due date even though I was well aware of the % of births and FTMs that deliver after their due dates, and I think it is based on a 28 day cycle which mine is on average longer than that. 

The week leading up I pretty much didn’t feel like doing anything besides stalk all of the pregnancy Reddit threads. I worked up until lunchtime on Thursday (the day before the scheduled induction) this might be a good time to mention that all medical things really gross me out, I close my eyes whenever Covid vaccines are shown on TV and the whole pregnancy I was super nervous about labor that I kinda avoided thinking about it. I read Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth (avoided reading the parts about epidurals and anything negative about stuff I maybe would have), I think this book is what made me think I def did not want to have my water broken though. I don’t really remember what was going through my mind the night before, Brendan and I both went to bed early around 9 and I slept super well. I woke up at 4 the next morning and had peanut butter toast for breakfast, knowing it might be the last time I would eat a meal. We were scheduled to be at the hospital by 5AM, I called beforehand to make sure there were still rooms available.

We got to the hospital a minute or so after 5, it felt and I think actually was pretty empty on the labor and delivery floor. Our 1st nurse was super nice and kinda funny/sarcastic. I changed into a hospital gown and kept my sports bra on because it was more comfortable, I don’t remember if I wasn’t thinking of logistics of not being able to take it off or if I thought there would be time before I delivered to take it off. Hope Bruno isn’t reading this but the whole time I def was just worried about making it through the next “thing” and not excited about meeting a baby that day it still didn’t really feel real or something that I was allowed to be excited about because I knew we had to get through lots of other stuff first (induction methods, cervical checks, an epidural, contractions, who knows what else). I think they put an IV thing in me next, I turned the other way and had Brendan hold my hand on the side I was facing and I told them I was a total baby for all things like this.

this is me VERY pregnant in the delivery room

Then the nurse came in to see how dilated I was because that would determine how they would proceed. Judging from the way the check felt I wasn’t too optimistic, I’m assuming I wasn’t more than 2.5 cm (which I was at since they started doing cervical checks at 37 weeks) but she was nice and was just like “you’re gonna need Cervidil”. If I was, I think it was 4cm or more I could’ve started with Pitocin. Getting the Cervidil placed felt the same as a cervical check, it stuck to the nurse’s glove or something at first though so I needed to sit through that twice. Before each thing I would ask the nurse or whoever what will this feel like and would this hurt worse than “X”, and each time they were SOO nice and helpful explaining everything. After that we were supposed to just let the Cervidil do its thing, shortly after my mom showed up YAY. 

The nurses and my Dr. I’m pretty sure was there too, came in to check to see how I was progressing at 9 AM and I don’t remember the #s but whatever it was it was enough to make them think I didn’t need Pitocin. My Dr. was at the hospital at that time and said she would like to break my water and I kinda freaked out because somewhere I read something about that that like worried me but she reassured me it would be fine etc. I had my glasses off intentionally the whole hospital stay and I made sure not to look at whatever she used to break my water. Brendan went to the bathroom right before this but thankfully my mom was there and she held my hand for it so I was okay. I was surprised at how big the gush was and how it just like continuously happens the whole time with the whole water thing it felt pretty gross and warm and I’m sure my mom and Bren appreciated me announcing each time I like felt the water lol. 

A little after 11:30am I got the epidural. The nurse came in before and said the anesthesiologist had an operation at 12:30 or something like that so if I waited longer to get the epidural I would have to wait until he was done with that and I really didn’t want to be like “trapped” in pain waiting for him lol and I felt like I had done enough riding the contractions so it made my decision on when to get it easier. I don’t remember when exactly I felt the first contraction but when it said I had one on the monitor I was like oh I think I have felt one of these before during pregnancy. Contractions do feel like super intense period cramps, I didn’t labor with them too long but it felt like "enough" to me to check the self created box I had for that like, yep I can say I experienced that now. I couldn’t imagine them getting like way stronger than the ones I had up until push time, so def glad I decided to get an epidural. I was on the yoga ball for most of the time until it was time for the epidural and moving around hooked up to all the stuff was kinda annoying to me. I wanted to bite something and pull on a rope, I don’t think I hurt Brendan and there wasn’t a rope in this labor room. I could see why laboring in a tub would be comfortable. The thing with contractions are you do know you’ll get a break when each one ends, it is like that Kimmy Schmidt thing where you can withstand just about anything for 10 seconds (longer in this case but you get it). I still without question knew I wanted an epidural. 

Okay so it is a little after 11:30 am and I think I’m 4cm dilated and the guy comes in to do the epidural, I forget if he and the nurses explained it but whoever did, did an awesome job. I didn’t know that you have to be totally still during one part so I prayed that I wouldn’t have a contraction during that part and yay I didn’t. The scariest part was the staying still the pain wasn’t that bad. It felt kinda like getting a tattoo. Brendan being there with me for everything was immensely helpful.

After I got the epidural I don’t remember it feeling weird, it was hard to move my legs but I still could. I also could tell when I got a contraction but I wouldn’t describe anything I felt from then on as painful like I wouldn’t say “ow” to anything after that which was an ideal experience IMO. I didn't take a nap but I tried to rest but I think Brendan maybe dozed off.  I don't remember what I was thinking about, I didn't watch TV but it was maybe on and I just checked my phone a few times. I don’t think I would’ve minded not being able to feel my legs at all but my mom kept saying how she thought they did a really good job with the ep because of that. I used a peanut ball occasionally and I brought blue Gatorade but it I guess it wasn't considered clear so I couldn't have any but I did have cranberry juice (like right before pushing) and an Italian ice, both REALLY helped and were nice treats. Whenever the nurses checked on my progress they were happy and I forget when the decision was made but they said I wouldn't need Pitocin because I was just moving along fine after my water was broken. The epidural didn't seem to slow down anything at all. Around 1:30pm I was 6cm dilated then by 2:40pm I was 9.5cm dilated which was surprising/cool how stuff can just progress that much and with the epidural it doesn't even hurt! 

I stayed at 9.5 for kinda a while, like the next time the nurse checked me I think I was still there but then the next time which was probably a little before 5pm she said I was ready to push (which at the time I was kinda nervous for because I was thinking how can you have an entire baby and it not really hurt but was assured it would just feel like pressure probably). At first I pushed just maybe not holding onto anything which seems super weird, and then the nurses had me hold onto the handle bar things on the side of the bed, and then the last way was holding onto a towel that the nurse held the other side of like tug of war. I pushed for around an hour I think. Bren kept saying after how I didn't talk at all, I think I just didn't wanna waste my energy and wanted to have the baby. Having my mom and Brendan cheering on either side was absolutely what I needed right then and really helped me keep going. The 2 nurses were amazing and all their cheering really helped too. Someone in there saying the wrong thing woulda been extremely detrimental to me during this time. The only thing it reminded me of was wall sits or something similar to that in a sports practice LOL. Idk why but before I didn't anticipate like a workout portion (probs because I kinda avoided thinking too much about labor), the time for a quick break after each contraction/ push really helps you gear up for the next one. At some point the nurse mentioned me needing to put on an oxygen mask because of the baby's heart rate and idk why I wasn't thinking like "the baby needs you to do this" but I was like I won't be able to do this with a mask on I'm like claustrophobic and she didn't make me but I did try putting the mask on and after a second of like AHH it was fine and didn't bother me much and it did help the baby's heart rate or whatever they were worried about. During the pushing I remember asking all of the "physically strong" Saints I could think of to intercede along with everyone in the room's patron Saints repeatedly. 

At some point they got the doctor. I think this was after they had already said something about seeing the baby's head and hair color which was really encouraging because besides the positive cheers it was hard to tell how much progress or close you were getting, like you really couldn't but when they saw the head it was like omg this is getting close/real. Now idk how long it was really scary because remember I didn't have glasses on and I actually am pretty sure my eyes were mostly closed besides a few times I would look at my mom or Brendan but I guess the baby's cord was wrapped around his neck and the Dr. had to do some smooth maneuver to get his shoulder out. My mom was crying which I knew but I thought it was because like "omg this is so beautiful witnessing a birth and not omg this is super scary he might die". Brendan also said afterwards how scary it was, so I'm SOOO glad I was unaware because I could've freaked out and my pushing coulda been impacted. When I was actually pushing him out I could feel that unlike the other pushes when it didn't feel like I was pushing anything but again, nothing painful! Bruno was born at 6:18pm (ha my mom was mad I left my sports bra on but the nurse skillfully lifted it over the IV somehow and said she had the same kind/ really liked it lol so we could do skin to skin). He was 8lbs. 10 oz. and 21 inches long. This was also a shocker, I expected a 6 or 7 lb. baby but not having any indication before worked in my favor because that woulda just been another thing that worried me! Also shocker, he was conventionally pretty cute, I was expecting him to look like a baby picture I had just seen of Brendan as a newborn. I had to ask Brendan after to check but we didn't attempt nursing until the 2nd room where you sleep and stuff. I kept saying "hi baby" and double checking with the Dr. that he was okay because I was in disbelief that we made it. I obvi cried while holding him, even the nurses were crying after he was born. 

baby B with the eye medicine stuff on

Brendan holding him for possibly the 1st time

I consider my mom and Brendan essential to this whole thing and feel grateful in a way I am having difficulty to describe. The (labor/delivery) nurses were also amazing.

In typical me fashion this is really long and ridden with typos and run on sentences but glad I have it for the mems!